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I guess my shame pales in comparison. I paid the dealer almost $400 to do the break-in service on the KTM.

Sounds like you need a intervention.

I hear ya. Today, for the first time in my life, I picked up my bike. From a shop. For maintenance. Brake pads. Flushing lines. Chain and sprockets replaced. 600 large, plus the cost of a couple beers there. (What a great place!) I mean, I used to be a real biker. Now, not so much. The ride home was great. Loved the brake job, much better than I could have done myself, but you know, no grease under my fingernails. Tools not being used, no barn beer. When I got home I planted some canna gillies for wifey.

have you checked the starter relay plug.on my 99 the plug had corroded .it would let through enough power to turn the lights on and prime the fuel pump but but not enough to start it.